Straight-talk advice on marriage, parenting, work and the everyday crossroads of life. From a longtime wife, mom, and marketing VP who’s been there. Welcome.

Category: Funny

  • Mom of the Year

    Co-Founder, CEO, COO, CFO and President of Smith & Daughters 1998 – Present Duties Responsible for effectively creating and managing multiple budgets -Spending my husband’s paycheck and any tax refunds…


  • On Losing Keys and Minds

    The Grandma: You know how we were talking about selling my car in Florida? I think we should do that. But I can’t find my car key. The Son-In-Law [SIL]:…


  • On Polygrip

    The Mom: Your polygrip will arrive on Friday. I just got a notification. The Grandma: The what? The Mom: Polygrip The Grandma: Polygrip? What’s that? Is it yours Big C?…


  • On Powdered Peppers

    “I just love all the music by the Red Hot Chili Powders.” The 10 y.o.


  • On Rewards

    The 14 yo: Mom, here’s the cash for the video game I want to download. You said you’d pay for $20 since I got a 100% at the checkpoint for…


  • On Alexander Hamilton

    My 10 yo returned to 5th grade in our local elementary school last week after a year and a half of homeschooling. They were on the American Revolution unit in…


  • On Watching Superbowl LI

    The Grandma: How old is Tom Brady? The 18 yo: What? How should I know? I don’t even like football. The Grandma: I was looking at your father. The Dad:…


  • On Happy Meal Toys

    The 10 y.o.: What a cool Pokemon shirt! The Mom: Too bad it’s in the Men’s section. Guys always get the coolest things… The 10 y.o.: Like Happy Meal prizes.…


  • On the American Revolution

    Learning about the American Revolution in home school today Asked the 10 y.o. to get her history book and she pulled out Hamilton the Musical instead! I love this kid  ❤️…


  • Mall Memories

    “Ah…Auntie Anne’s. The smell of childhood.” The 13 y.o.


Scarlett of Suburbia shares personal opinions and general life perspective for entertainment and informational purposes only. It is not professional, medical, psychological, legal, or financial advice, and no columnist-reader relationship is created by reading this site or sending a message. For serious concerns, please consult a qualified professional. Submissions may be published, edited for length or clarity, and shared anonymously.