Real Advice. Real Life.

Straight-talk advice on marriage, parenting, work and the everyday crossroads of life. From a longtime wife, mom, and marketing VP who’s been there. Welcome.

Category: Parenting

  • My ANIMALS are NOT real PEOPLE! The 4 y.o. from the top bunk who threw a stuffed animal across the room with each capitalized word

  • On Evita

    The 8 y.o: Who was Eva Peron? The 11 y.o: She was a beautiful actress who lived in Argentina. Her husband was elected President. Then he became a dictator. The…

  • Dad – I’m glad you didn’t marry some weird Spanish dude. Erm, I meant Mom. The 8 y.o.

  • Dad, I’m sorry you’re gonna have to find some other furniture. I’m sleeping in your bed tonight. The 4 y.o.

  • I don’t love that. The 4 y.o.’s newest response to almost everything.

  • The backseat of the Volvo looks like a cheddar-bunny mass suicide. The Dad after driving for 11 hours.

  • On the Game of Life

    The Mom: Where’s my iPhone? The 11 y.o.: I’m playing the Game of Life on it against myself. I’m winning…and I’m losing.

  • So I just sent an email to Heavenly Father… The 8 y.o.

  • On Allergies

    The 8 y.o: My grandmother is allergic to avocados, cats and…uh….uh… The 11 y.o: Republicans. That’s why she always starts sneezing whenever she visits us.

  • High School Musical meets the Best of Schoolhouse Rock? Yeah, that’s a mashup I could miss. The 11 y.o.

Scarlett of Suburbia shares personal opinions and general life perspective for entertainment and informational purposes only. It is not professional, medical, psychological, legal, or financial advice, and no columnist-reader relationship is created by reading this site or sending a message. For serious concerns, please consult a qualified professional. Submissions may be published, edited for length or clarity, and shared anonymously.