Scarlett of Suburbia

Field Notes from The Motherhood


March 2015

On 3rd Grade Market Day

It’s 3am and I’m taking a break from making clothespin bunnies for my 8 yo’s “Market Day” at school tomorrow. That I just learned about at 4pm this afternoon.

My little Creative-Dictator-in-Training “had a vision” where she wanted me to decorate a box like a stage with coordinated scrapbook paper wrapped around the exterior to (and I quote), “merchandise the hobbit landbunnies” which in her artistic mind also included: a mossy ‘floor’ installation around a mirror “pond”, a white picket fence, scattered flowers, a tree in the corner with a clothesline hanging diagonally across the top of ‘the stage’.

Spring shadow box

I asked if she was going to hang anything off the ‘clothesline’ and she rolled her eyes as she said, “Um yah. Cause last year the kids were so dumb with their money and by the time they got to my booth, because, “S-last names are always at the end of the line, they didn’t have much money left to spend with me.

So this year, I want to attract their attention with the decorated box. It will sit on my desk all morning looking fun and I’ll make a sign that says “Lil C’s Bunnies Are the Perfect Easter Present” Or something like that. Anyway.

Cutie clothespin Easter BunniesThen when Market Day at school starts, I’ll bribe them with candy if they buy in the first 10 minutes, like “Buy a bunny and get a bag of jellybeans free”.

Oh, and can I have some bags of jellybeans too? Or Peeps? Then I’ll sell the bunnies for $5 each. And when the teachers announce the 5-minute countdown, I’m going to drop the price on the rest of the bunnies and offer the candy too until they are all gone. I’m thinking like 30 bunnies total, k? Plus candy.

That reminds me, can you also paint some mini-bunnies with the tiny clothespins so I can decorate them and hang them from the clothesline? Maybe another 20 or so. Then I can sell the mini-bunnies to the kids with only a quarter or two at the end.  I’m totally gonna crush Market Day this year!”

Happy Easter Curly hair girl


On Future Husband Research

The Mom: Who’s mission call video are you watching?

The 16 y.o: No idea. But he’s so cute! I think his name is Landon. Or Stockton. They’re twins.

The Mom: It’s Friday night and you are on YouTube watching some guys you don’t know open their mission call letters…Friday night is “date night”, honey.

The 16 y.o: But these guys left in 2013. So they will be Returning Missionaries this year. In the videos I can how nicely their house is furnished, how he treats his siblings, and then I check him out on Facebook. That’s my “dating” strategy.

Married by 22

On Dead Men and Holidays


“Oh goodie. Another holiday in America celebrating a dead guy. So far this year: Martin Luther King Jr, St. Valentine, Abraham Lincoln, George Washington and St Patrick. Why, WHY are there so many?”

–The 12 yo on St Patrick’s Day

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