Scarlett of Suburbia

Field Notes from The Motherhood


May 2014

On Filing Cabinets

The 11 y.o.: Whatcha doin’ Mom? What’s that thing?

The Mom: It’s called a filing cabinet. It’s where I keep the important school papers and file them away. 

The 11 y.o.: But isn’t that what Google Drive does with Google Docs? 



On Captain Obvious

The 11 yo: Is this corn the 94% or the 6%?

The Mom: The what?

The 11 yo: Modified. GMO’s. Which is it?

The Mom: It’s corn. Eat it.

The 11 yo: It has pepper on it. Why does pepper always make people sneeze in cartoons?

The Mom: I have no idea. Maybe some animator a long time ago was allergic to pepper and then others copied it. Like why A113 appears in every Pixar movie. 

The 11 yo: Because that was their classroom. Which has nothing to do with pepper. Or GMO corn. Try again, mom.



On Apples Falling Near Trees

The Mom: It’s a necklace I got as an early mother’s day gift.

The 7 y.o.: Big C is in copper, M is gold and my name is on the silver disk. Which is the most precious?

The 11 y.o.: We’re all different minerals from the same cave. 


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